18

Hencorp Gets Into The
Holiday Spirit(s)

December 14, 1997:

A Message from Hencorp

As the holiday season draws ever near
The Henrys can get maudlin, nostalgic - even dear,
In our Yuletide missive of rhyme at random,
We like to applaud the applauders: We thank our fandom

This year it's your invaluable support that we toast
More worthy than Celine's $8 Mill home off the coast,
You've stuck with us through thick and thin
Top of the charts, deletes, and back agin

We're not here to say we're cool
We're just thankful, that's our tool

Sure we could carry on and regale ya
Of indulgence, arrests and backstage saturnalia
Eatin' like Meatloaf, drinkin' beer till we're portly,
But the truth is, over single malt Monte turned 40

So herein we'll avoid the rock and roll myth
It's boring, we've been there, and it's lacking in pith
We do the gigs, we pocket the cash
We pay each bill and take out the trash

And the thing about gigs is, when you got 'em, you got 'em
We were hot in the spring and cooler in autumn
Remember that festival run, culminatin' in Texas?
What an opportunity that was! A schmoozing nexus

Okay, it's true, the gigs did tail off last autumn
But so did U2's and that didn't rot 'em!
It's show biz and you have to roll with the punches,
Take public transit and pack your own lunches

Is this less than you require from your popular icons -
A too-brutal portrait of middle-class siphons
You want your Hawaiians down from the 'hood
Cooler than Toronto's Sook-Yin Lee or Dallas Good?

You need something hipper, right? Cutting edge, tribal?
Kay! How 'bout some vintage Hencorp libel:

(Sung to the tune "Wouldn't it be Loverly?" from My Fair Lady)

We hate you Jersey jerks and we don't care

You sold our discs and kept the money there,

Weasels, slimeballs, lowlife Yanks!

Oh wooooooooouldn't it be loverly....

And as for you Memphis Hens you took our name

Typical Americans you ducked the blame

Finger-pointers, obfuscators, Damien's friends

Oh wooooooooouldn't it be loverly....

But of course we're above that - we're only kidding!
At holiday time it's love that we're bidding
MikeDaveMonte'n'Don, why, we ain't needy
Just this Feb we'll be trackin' a new CD!

In closing The (T.O.) Henrys would simply say
How much you mean to us in every galldarn way
So onward and upward till the next millenium,
Instrumental, impecunious ... but better 'n any of 'em!

Happy Holidays from your pals The Henrys